Frustrations, friendships, findings

This week has been pretty slow- the second week of "planning" before the summer program starts has caught me having so many moments of unstructured time that I am often horribly unproductive. Yesterday was a killer; I knew I had things I could be getting done but since none of it was urgent I ended up feeling numb and purposeless, and on top of it all the congested city had started bogging me down. I realize now, though, that so much of it was my own state of mind; today I entered with a clear head after a rejuvenating work out last night and pre-work reflection this morning by the pond at Central Park, and I've spent my hours just soaking up all of the wonderful characters and new friends I have made here at the POINT. I'm sitting at my friend/coworker Tavi's messy desk writing this, and she just shuffled in with a little boy swinging through the air in her arms- Tavi the MONSTER. Then he left, and Earl(my supervisor) came around to point out the belated birthday present he had just put ontop of a pile of papers- a framed picture of Tavi with a red wig and Earl dancing for the camera, as kids swarmed around them. They had a little "i love you" moment and I was left to return to the screen. Am I hard at work? Not exactly, but when I am it doesn't even feel like work.

A delayed beginning...

Every time I try to begin this blog I become too overwhelmed with things I want to mention so end up freezing and deleting whatever I've said because it seems hopelessly inadequate. But I guess I'll give a few brief thoughts for now- so my love for my college life has made me dread that fateful day when I would have to enter into "real" adult life, with a less-than-ideal job and no time for those endless Olin Libe Cafe discussions about life and philosophy; but my experience working at the POINT already has changed my feelings about the future. Entering the dynamic, relaxed, communal environment each day, I feel energized and inspired to learn from the diverse perspectives of my coworkers and to create a curriculum that will stimulate the kids I will be teaching in the summer program. Because the POINT is not a school, I get the feeling that it is maybe even capable of teaching its kids more because they choose to be there, but it is a difficult challenge to give kids' intrinsic motivation when they are used to the extrinsic motives that school provides them, so Christine(another CUSP intern) and I are having an interesting and somewhat difficult time figuring out how we should approach the creative writing/drama class we are planning, but I love the challenge. I also realize how different the kids' and community's culture is from what I'm used to, and I find myself wanting to prove myself to them, whether it be by picking up new mannerisms, knowing the shows/artists they respect, going on a shopping spree in the South Bronx or showing them I can actually dance. Stepping on the subway from the upper east side and off into the south Bronx each day, I feel like I am traversing hundreds of miles underground, when in fact I am only traveling a few train stops away within the same city.